Archive for Mindset
Are You Being Your Real Self?
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I just finished my introductory letter about this month’s hypnotic download program. In researching material for this product I perused Transforming Your Self: Becoming Who You Want to Be
The idea of the true self or authentic self is very common. What’s less common is knowing when you are expressing or fully engaging your true self. Steve suggests this and shows several ways for you to connect with and operate from your true self. It stands to reason, doesn’t it, that when you are connecting in this way, you will be more congruent and have more impact on the world?
You have heard people say things like, “I wasn’t being myself” or “That’s not really who I am” or some other statement that implies there is another self, a false self or an unreal self. What is it that makes this statement make intrinsic sense? I propose it’s the idea that we have a true self that is somehow known to us.
Steve illustrates in many ways that this is so. He suggests processes for readers that allow us to discover how our brain codes experiences. He is able to systematically describe and make possible these discoveries through the experiences he recommends, allowing you to make your own discoveries. Then he illustrates the principles, many of which seem to be universals that actually allow not only learning but also change.
He expands on the idea of your true self, explaining that it’s better to think about your real selves, because we actually create several selves. It is useful to know which self serves you in pursuit of your values. It is important to find what is enjoyable, interesting and pleasing, etc. Having a self makes it possible to have a self-concept. Developing a self-concept that is true to what is important to you is what effectively supports you in your life goals.
I have been particularly interested in this theme of the true self because it often emerges when I am coaching. Many clients discover that as children or young people they took on or adopted a self that someone else wanted for them rather than allowing who they were to truly emerge. One way to understand this phenomenon is to recognize that when we are congruent with who we truly are, we move through the world with a great deal of clarity and power. Would it surprise you to discover that sometimes people play “small” so that others around them can be more comfortable and relaxed?
This phenomenon implies that one of your challenges is to be comfortable with your “selves” and stop shutting down or minimizing your power and clarity so that others can be comfortable. We may discover just the opposite—many people actually prefer us to be in our power. It might be better to say that we need to allow ourselves to be who we truly are and discover what emerges from that decision, rather than choosing to make someone else comfortable.
People who don’t think well of themselves usually don’t attempt very much, and if they don’t attempt very much they won’t accomplish much. So being able to identify who you truly are in different contexts will allow you to congruently take action, letting you be more productive and do things you enjoy more—rather than what you think you should do.
Are you comfortable with your true self? With all of your true selves? Are you letting yourself be who you truly are?
P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.
About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/
Dream Big for Success
Posted by: | CommentsIt’s been a whirlwind of travel the past month, and I am about to leave today for Chicago for a seminar to train coaches on how to resolve limiting beliefs.
My travels began with San Diego last month, where I witnessed the fruition of two people’s “Big Dream.” Carey Peters and Stacey Morgenstern had their first of what I know will be many large gatherings to show health and nutrition practitioners how to run a business. Their audience, or tribe, is notorious for being mission driven but business phobic. One of the reasons Carey and Stacey were on stage is that they decided they were going to have a thriving business. What that meant for Carey was taking on some old demons linked to money. Money is really a generic way to think about prospering—you know, actually living a life with sufficient money to really allow your message to be in the world. Many of us have taken on beliefs that make prospering, as opposed to struggling, almost impossible.
Carey and Stacey overcame early messages about charging what you are worth and feeling good about it. Not only did they do that, but they now know the steps they took to make it happen. The two of them described their struggles and how they overcome them so that their clients could put in place the steps necessary to create thriving businesses. Most important, they continuously stressed the necessity to take on limiting beliefs about money and business practices. They know that without the work on mindset, there is a low likelihood of setting and reaching high financial goals
The other area that they so clearly modeled was the importance of investing in both your business and yourself. Their program went well because they had a team in place and had a structure that supported what they did. They acted like the success they are. A quote comes to mind: “Success leaves clues.”
For the past month I have been struggling with putting more foundational structures in place. I say struggling because my wife Beth and my VA Kristi Pavlik have pushed me ( I don’t think it’s been easy for them) in the direction I need to go if I am to maintain the level of success and, even more important, impact on the world that I want to have.
When you think about wanting to be a “success” and you have in mind someone like Carey or Stacey, take time to discover the mindsets they have or have adopted that made their success possible. The group I am connecting with in Chicago will be doing mindset work. I think the next Carey Peters will come out of this work.
P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.
About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/
Would You Like to Embody Confidence, Courage and Determination?
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This month’s audio download is about Gaining Powerful States. It takes listeners through a process that will allow them to easily access states of courage, confidence and determination.
This recording is the fifth in the Belief Breakthrough Series™ Download of the Month Club, twelve hypnotic recordings designed to accelerate business success, positive attitudes and habits, and vibrant health.
There is an NLP idea or presupposition that states, “We always do the best we can at the time—or made the best decision we could at the time we made it.” So when we are able to step into highly resourceful states, the decisions we make and the actions we take will be better and of higher quality—allowing us to achieve excellence.
After listening to this recording and learning how to effortlessly access powerful states of courage, confidence and determination, you will also be equipped to better access other states of excellence. This download is designed to maximize your ability to access these resource states, making it easier to achieve more of what is really important to you.
Are you ready to access powerful states of excellence?
For more information about this and similar recordings, check out my Belief Breakthrough Series™ Download of the Month Club.
P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.
About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/
Breaking It Down to Beat Overwhelm
Posted by: | CommentsI had a follow-up call with a former client today, and within the first few minutes he began describing a sense of being overwhelmed. It became clear to me that he had linked together a number of experiences so that when he thought of any one of them, he immediately pictured all of them and became overwhelmed.
I asked if I could offer some suggestions, and he consented. I told him to take the list he had made of everything he needed to do and use a pair of scissors to cut the list apart.
I wanted him to create distance between the items by separating them and positioning them on the floor away from each other. I mentioned that this might help him breathe better—given that his breathing had become irregular when he started describing his sense of overwhelm. As he laid the pieces of the list on the floor, he calmed down and said, “Oh, some of these really are separate.” He then added, “Now I can see what needs to be done first.” And he breathed easily.
Like many people, this person had a visual representation of what was overwhelming him—a bunch of things swirling around together in his mind, even though they didn’t necessarily go together. This exemplifies how every problem has a structure that keeps it in place.
It’s important to help people break their problems down into smaller components so that they can address them individually. I don’t tell people how to organize their issues or prioritize their problems, but I do help them chunk issues down into more manageable pieces.
Are your issues—or those of some of your clients—really as unmanageable as they seem?
P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.
About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/
Are You a Leader that Others Want to Follow?
Posted by: | CommentsHow do you become a leader that others want to follow? This is the topic of this month’s download. Learning how to nurture your inner leader is particularly useful if you know you need to step into leadership roles.
Most of you are aware of the importance of leadership. It’s a continuous topic on the news and TV news shows. Why? Because we understand the importance of having strong, compelling leaders. What is not as clear is what constitutes a “leader” or how exactly you can become a leader that others want to follow.
Becoming the Leader that Others Want to Follow will take you through a process of learning how to tap into your leadership abilities and more effectively utilize them. You have been leading yourself for a long time. What this means is that you cannot not lead.
This month’s recording will give you an opportunity to explore and, where appropriate, improve your natural leadership. You may be questioning whether or not you want to lead, but since you are still reading this post, you are interested in learning. When you learn about your unique leadership style, you can then apply it to learning to lead and inspire others.
Imagine that you could step forward in a powerful, congruent way so that you can share your passion or message with others so they will be inspired.
Are you ready to lead?
For more information about this and similar recordings, check out my Belief Breakthrough Series™ 2011 Download of the Month Club.
P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.
About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/
Do You Have an Energizing Mission?
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According to studies of people who have survived “incurable” cancers, they had two things in common at the time they were battling the disease. First, they believed that their treatment—whatever it was—would work. Second, they experienced a re-mission; their illnesses didn’t disappear, but they took on something larger than themselves, a new mission. They dedicated themselves to a new life’s work. For some it was a charity, for others a friend or family member, but in all cases, they took on something they felt was more important than themselves.
Waiki, our chow chow, is currently struggling with cancer. Since becoming sick, she has been less focused on our other dogs and more focused on us. She is now dedicated to her relationship with Beth and me. Waiki depends on us in ways she didn’t or wouldn’t before, even allowing me to pick her up and put her in the car. She embodies trust.
Waiki’s health was deteriorating when I left for Las Vegas at the end of July, and it got worse upon my departure. When I cut my trip short and returned home, however, she improved. Something about me coming home allowed her a recovery or remission of sorts. Her tumor stopped bleeding; she starting eating on her own; and she began walking much better. Since that time she no longer is affected by her tumor, and even though she struggles to get up from the floor, she is always up for her daily walk.
Beliefs can have that effect. They are powerful. To help clients who are struggling with an illness, try to connect them with an important mission. Assist them in finding a higher purpose, and it might make a difference. The flipside of this is exemplified in retirement. Those who feel like they lost their identity and purpose upon retirement may have a hard time enjoying it.
People who have a mission they really identify with rarely struggle with motivation. Rather than trying to address motivation on a behavioral level, look at the reasons for doing what you’re doing. Establishing or reconnecting with a purpose reduces the issue of motivation. When there is a strongly held mission, things like behaviors, motivation and identity are more likely to fall into place.
P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.
About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/
Want to Relieve Stress and Improve Your Mood?
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I recently completed Stress-Busting Mood Lifter, which is my current download of the month. While completing this audio I realized that it is useful to consider stress as a given—a necessary fact of life. What becomes important is how you decide to manage it.
With that in mind, I challenge you to think about the following.
- What are your strategies for managing the stress in your life?
- What would happen if you decided to actively create down time and didn’t give into the “I don’t have enough time” trap?
- Do you recognize that creating peace goes deeper than the circumstances around you?
So what do you do to manage the stress in your life? Do you use a proactive approach? How do you think of stress? Please share your comments, for I am curious about how others deal with the stress in their lives.
For more information about Stress-Busting Mood Lifter and similar recordings, check out my Belief Breakthrough Series™ 2011 Download of the Month Club.
P.S. This sunset photo was taken from my back yard, a great place for me to create peace and manage my stress.
P.P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.
About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/
What Do You Want?
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In my last post I described how the process of visualizing what you want can be a powerful motivator. Indeed, effective change is easier when you have a clear sense of what you want. When you can clearly state exactly what you desire, then your unconscious mind is more likely to “get it.”
In order to facilitate this, you should to spend a lot of time visualizing what you want, feeling and experiencing it in your mind’s eye. Doing this allows your unconscious mind to organize your thoughts and behavior in ways that will help you get what you want.
When you do exercises like these, it’s important to focus on what you want, not what you don’t want. Only visualize representations of what you truly would like.
When I utilize hypnosis with clients, I often use this process first. I find that by helping them clearly describe their goals and desires prior to hypnosis, their unconscious minds will be more receptive to suggestion while under hypnosis. They will then be more open to the reaffirming suggestions I make during hypnosis.
For example, if someone says that he or she wants to be engaged in learning on a more regular basis, then that person should talk about wanting to learn. In hypnosis, you can then suggest ways to make learning possible and to assist the client in being open to learning, saying things like, “When you leave here, you may discover that you learn more easily than before. You’ll realize how important learning is to you, and you may discover even more ways of learning.”
In this particular example, what’s important about the process is that learning has taken on new meaning. In the grander scheme, this exercise is about framing your mindset. You have to determine what you consider to be important so your mind will know how to go about the process of supporting that goal in just the right way.
Note: One of my goals is to travel on all of the major rivers of the world, and I’ve been on ten so far. The waterfall pictured was one of the many spectacular views I enjoyed while traveling along the Manú River in Peru. Have you visualized your travel goals?
P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.
About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/
Are You Living Your Dreams?
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Thierry Henry photo courtesy Wikipedia
While Beth and I were at a professional soccer game last Saturday night featuring the New York Red Bulls and Sporting Kansas City, we noticed that the Red Bulls’ featured player (star) was Thierry Henry. We then realized that it was exactly 10 years ago to the day that Beth and I saw him play in London when he was new to Arsenal Soccer.
We got to meet Thierry back then because we were working for Tony Adams, who was the captain of the team at that time. We had been hired to set up an addiction clinic for professional athletes, which also included a peak performance aspect. As part of working for Tony, we went to several Arsenal games and sat in his box. Afterwards we were invited to the post-game party in the club. It was there that we met Thierry.
Working in London for Tony Adams was a dream job, not only because I love soccer—and still play—but also because I had the chance to work for one of the world’s best soccer stars.
I truly believe that experience was the result of setting two different goals: one to work internationally and another to work with professional athletes. I just didn’t know that I would get to do both at once.
What important dreams are you setting in place? Do you have the beliefs to support those dreams? Search your memory and see if you have had an experience like mine—one that was the result of setting a big goal and then going for it.
by Jenna Avery
(posted on her blog, February 15, 2011)
Terry Hickey is a talented NLP practitioner who specializes in belief change work with high end coaches, entrepreneurs, visionaries, leaders, and athletes. Many of the visionaries he works with are in the film industry, including actors, directors, producers, and dialog coaches. He also works with financial visionaries and professional athletes. I interviewed Terry last year as part of my Creative Visionaries Interview Series to see what he can teach us about why some visionaries succeed and others do not.
Visionary Guiding Principles
Here are some of the brilliant pieces of wisdom I gleaned from my conversation with Terry (you can listen to the full interview below):
1. Visionaries have a higher purpose that is the underpinning of the vision they create. They also have a sense of mission — a joy and passion for what they do. They don’t see it as a struggle, but rather as a joy and a privilege, to create what they are here to create.
2. Visionaries face the same sorts of challenges and opportunities the rest of us do, but they see them as opportunities. In other words, don’t think of a lack of success as failure, think of it as feedback. For example, try on this thought, “I haven’t yet employed the right strategies.” Ask, “How is this an opportunity? What’s the learning?”
3. Successful visionaries have a mentor or coach to turn to for help reframing or thinking about things differently. Even Bill Gates and Walt Disney have had mentors. Choose mentors that are as competent as or more competent than you are — don’t be afraid of competition. Choose to learn from people who know more than you do.
4. As a visionary, your role is to create such a powerful vision that others want to create it with you. Terry notes, “Leaders have followers, managers have conscripts.”
5. Visionaries hold what they are doing as so important that they simply can’t NOT do it. They are driven by something larger than themselves. They always go back to their dream — even when challenges come up that keep them awake at night and even when they might lose people they love over it — it’s so powerful they always come back to it.
6. A quality that sets visionaries apart is clarity. They know what they are doing and why they are doing it.
7. Visionaries are so committed that they are willing to get through any stuckness that may come up. They know they must manage things like writer’s block or athelete’s slumps so it doesn’t become their overriding experience.
8. Successful visionaries recognize their own limitations and bring someone on board to help fill in the gaps. Warren Buffet, Oprah, Bill Gates all have in common that they have brought people on board to help them with their problem areas.
9. Visionaries must learn the distinctions between each part of the process of bringing an idea to fruition in order to be successful. This includes creative phase (brainstorming), the evaluative phase (feasibility), and the project management phase (procedural and systematic). Walt Disney used three different rooms for each of these processes — each had its own time and place.
Books Terry mentioned when speaking with Jenna:
• Magic In Practice
• The Speed of Trust
• From Coach to Awakener
• Changing Belief Systems with NLP
• Beliefs: Pathways to Health & Well-Being
• The Strategies of Genius
Note: You can learn more about Jenna Avery by visiting her website at www.JennaAvery.com.
About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW.
