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Archive for environment

Feb
01

Learn to Be with Your Clients

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This month’s tip is about the importance of being able to be with powerful and often uncomfortable feelings. When you are confronted with strong feelings, your ability to welcome and be with those feelings will enhance your effectiveness with clients.

Given that you are asking your clients to stay with and process uncomfortable feelings, your ability to model that behavior is as important as any other work that you’ll do with them. It is one of the attributes that high-end coaches must develop.

This is at the heart of the idea of “holding space” for your clients. This also will resonate with the idea that what you resist persists. It’s often the feeling about the feeling that’s the problem, not the feeling itself. For instance, if you are welcoming of your fear, that’s different than being fearful of or embarrassed about your fear.

So in addition to being able to be with uncomfortable feelings, it’s the ability to have a welcoming, curious attitude that will allow you to manage what would otherwise be extremely difficult or even seem impossible.

As always, let me know how I can help. Just share a limiting-beliefs question that has been challenging you or a client, and I’d be happy to address it here or in a future issue of the newsletter. Call me at 520.237.4435 or e-mail me at Terry@terryhickey.com with your question.

Please feel free to share this tip with anyone you think might enjoy it. When doing so, please forward it in its entirety, including the copyright information and the bio below. Thanks, and enjoy!

About Terry

Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW.

Check out Terry’s website, http://terryhickey.com/, to find out more about his coaching, Belief Breakthrough Method opportunities and other services. Be sure to download his FREE audio interview: 3 Most Perilous Coaching Mistakes That Will Stop Your Clients in Their Tracks.

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As you may recall, last month’s article was prompted by a question from a reader about how to best use behavioral change techniques. As promised, this month’s article continues that discussion, addressing the application of behavioral techniques in difference contexts.

Before you work on a behavioral change, it’s important to pay attention to the level at which the problem occurs. You need to be sure that you really are working at the behavioral level. (See my blog for information on this topic: Do You Know the Logical Levels for Successful Change?)

The next step is to establish a clear outcome and frame it in the positive. It should be a very clear goal expressed in terms of what is wanted—not what isn’t wanted. Rather than “I don’t want to be broke next year,” it should be reframed to say, “I want to make [specific income amount] in the coming year.”

Once you know what the client wants and what they have now, then the next question to ask is “What will bridge the gap?” Sometimes that can actually involve a behavioral technique. For example, someone might actually need a strategy for handling their appointment calendar. If that works, great. If not, you want to go back to the drawing board and ask, “What would have to happen so that you could manage your calendar the way you want to?” That question will likely tease out an underlying belief. If that’s the case, then you know the work is at the belief level.

Some of these questions might tease out a “part of me” answer: “Part of me wants to do this, and part wants to do that.” If that’s the case, you’ll need to do some integration work so that the parts can be in harmony.

As your coaching becomes more focused, you’ll discover that the work you are doing is more at the beliefs and values and the identity level than at the behavioral level.

Please feel free to share this tip with anyone you think might enjoy it. When doing so, please forward it in its entirety, including the copyright information and the bio below. Thanks, and enjoy!

About Terry

Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW.

Check out Terry’s website, http://terryhickey.com/, to find out more about his coaching, Belief Breakthrough Method opportunities and other services. Be sure to download his FREE audio interview: 3 Most Perilous Coaching Mistakes That Will Stop Your Clients in Their Tracks.

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In my last post I shared the lower levels of logical change: environment, behaviors and capabilities. Now I’m going to move on to the upper levels. Changes that occur at one or more of these levels—for you or your clients—are more likely to be successful and sustained.

  • Beliefs and Values: this level addresses how you organize your experience in the world; remember, a belief is a generalization from experience. Beliefs are adopted early on and become our guiding force, not learning from life. For example, if I believe the world is safe, my experiences will be very different from those of someone who thinks the world is dangerous. Given that beliefs rarely exist independent of one another, we each have systems of beliefs that can create problems when they don’t work together.

    Underlying beliefs affect the lower levels of change. Oftentimes changes at the lower levels—environment, behaviors and capabilities—won’t last if the beliefs that hold them in place are not addressed.

  • Identity: this level is crucial because it determines who you are in the world and how you think of yourself in relation to others. For example, saying “I am a golfer” represents an identity—who you are—and is different from saying “I play golf,” which only refers to something you do.

    Your identity influences how you move through the world and what you do or don’t do. Saying “I’m not the kind of person who takes risks” means that your new learning experiences will be limited. Describing yourself as a “risk taker” has different implications and may result in dangerous behaviors that do not serve you well.

    What I understand when I’m working with people is that the identity you hold may need to be adapted or shifted in order for a significant change to happen in your life. Identity has an impact on all the levels beneath it.

  • Mission or Purpose: this speaks to, “What’s more important than me?” or “What’s larger than me?” Teachers often answer this by saying that they get to have an impact on children—that it’s the most important thing they can do. Mission is crucial. That’s why people struggle at a job that to them has no purpose. When people recover from illnesses that were supposedly terminal, it is often because of mission, or remission—acquiring a new sense of purpose. For many, having a connection with God or a higher power makes a difference, feeling a bond with something larger than themselves.

Change can happen at any one of these levels, but you need to recognize at what level the work is being done. For example, sometimes a reframe doesn’t quite sell because it’s at the wrong level.

It’s also essential to know at what level a problem exists. Coaches are often trained to work at the behavioral level, yet problems usually are not behavioral—or not just behavioral. There’s often an underlying belief at another, higher level that may prevent a change at this lower level from making a difference.

Understanding the relationships between and among all these levels can profoundly influence the way you work with people. Ultimately, you want to create alignment at all six levels. When everything is aligned for a client, their actions will be more effective and precise, they won’t waste energy, and they’ll have more success.

Are your values, identity and mission congruent with your goals? Do you have a client who needs to make a change at one of these levels to support his or her goals?

P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.

About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/

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When people say, “Well, at one level I believe this, but at another level, it’s this,” it shows that they are thinking about issues at different levels. Whether they know it or not, they are referring to logical levels of thinking or change.

There are six levels that I hold as important in whatever change work I do. They can be useful for understanding change from an individual or an organizational point of view. Let me explain…

  • Environment: change at this level implies making a change in one’s environment; it could involve bringing in an organizational specialist to rearrange an office environment in support of a mission or job, or it could be as simple as reorganizing furniture, adjusting the temperature or making ergonomic changes.
  • Behaviors: this addresses what you do; to create behavioral changes you might bring in the same organizational person to teach a set of behaviors to maximize the environmental changes, which could range from new methods of doing simple tasks to things such as assertiveness training or behavioral intervention.
  • Capabilities: this refers to how you organize your behaviors—the strategies people come up with to carry out behaviors, whether for work or play; it involves thinking at a higher level about how behaviors are organized. (For some the problem is that they don’t have a strategy on this level. For example, many people claim they don’t know how to make decisions, but the actual problem is that they don’t know how to put one set of criteria ahead of another; they don’t have a strategy for making their decisions.)

Before I describe the rest, keep in mind that there is a hierarchy to these levels. These first three—environment, behaviors and capabilities—are the lower levels of thinking. It’s tougher to successfully make a change if you intervene at a lower level, at least in terms of making systemic changes. I’ll share information about the upper levels in my next post.

In the meanwhile, can you think of a change you’d like to make at one of these levels? Is there something in YOUR environment that needs to be adjusted to support your goals?

P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.

About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW. http://terryhickey.com/

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Apr
06

Did You Know?

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Those of you who are still getting to know me may not realize that I grew up in La Oroya, a multinational mining town in Peru. Here are a few other tidbits about me and my time in Peru.

  • I have spent a lot of time riding horseback there. Thats Bonita, my first horse, in the photo. I used to ride every day.  One of the things that riding taught me was the importance of attending to your environment and staying in communication with your horse. That certainly applies to developing rapport.  
  • When I was 19 I had a summer job in the mountains of southern Peru. It took six hours to get there via dirt roads and 4-wheel drive, and not surprisinglythere were very few amenities. It was amazing to spend time in such a remote area.  That job required that I work with a diverse group of people and be very flexible in relating to others. If you didn’t treat people well, they would not work for you or with you. 
  • I have studied with and served as a translator for a Peruvian shaman.  What I learned from him has had an impact on my entire life. His ability to be in harmony with nature was profound and allowed him to work with people and their issues in miraculous ways. He had the ability to work with all kinds of people and issues. As I write this I am reminded of how my early life and experiences guide so much of what I do today. I am a big fan for suggesting that we have as many “out of the box” experiences as we can.  
  • The most memorable view I’ve ever seen was in Peru, at Machu Picchu. I was there at 7 a.m. on my birthday one year. There was a light mist and rainbows, and it was spectacular.  It is one of the places in the world that I think affects people on the spiritual level. It certainly did for me.

How has your life been affected by your early experiences? What experiences could you have in the future that might open your world view?

(The image of Machu Picchu is courtesy of Martin St-Amant via Wikimedia Commons.)

P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do. Just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.

About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want NOW. http://terryhickey.com/

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To wrap up 2010, my wife and I made some changes in our office because it wasn’t supporting our purpose and mission. In order to work more effectively and efficiently, we cleared out a lot of clutter and moved several things around.

Getting rid of the clutter made a big difference. It was having a negative impact, and we have both felt a sense of relief from removing it. We also painted one room to create a color scheme that’s in harmony with a more positive environment. All of these changes have made a real difference for both of us.

Does your office environment really support what you do? What about your home environment? If not, what are you going to do about it?

P.S. Do you want to reprint this article? Please do, just be sure that it remains intact and includes the following bio.

About Terry: Terry Hickey, M.S., is a Certified NLP Professional Coach, Business Trainer and Consultant, a Certified Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the co-owner of NLP Advantage Group. Originator of the Belief Breakthrough Method™, Terry specializes in teaching coaches and entrepreneurs how to rapidly resolve limiting beliefs about wealth and success. His tips and strategies can help you launch yourself into the future you want… NOW.

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Copyright 2012 Terry Hickey, a division of NLP Advantage Group, Inc. All rights reserved.
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Telephone: 520.237.4435
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